Hazelnut Dreams

Unpacked

2011-06-05T22:02:00.000-05:00

Finally, a month or so into being home, I've unpacked.
Well, that's not entirely true. I'd already unpacked anything that I need for the summer, BUT my room was a mess of those unpacked things. Today I cleaned all that.
Over the past school year, whenever I was home, with the exception of winter break, it was only for a few days. I never really saw the point in cleaning my room, which has been a mess since roughly last June when I started preparing for college.
Kitty seems slightly confused by the change, and perhaps not all-together in favor of it. Personally though, I'm loving it! I even organized my bookshelf, and am now dreaming of a home with shelves built into the walls and floor to ceiling windows... For now, I'll just stick with my normal, creeper-proof windows and my single tiny bookshelf that only holds less than a 3rd of the books I own.
Now for some new posters....
<3 Kiersten

Hello Summer

2011-05-31T23:33:00.006-05:00

Well hello! Sorry for being gone for so long, but Heather and I are back now (finally).

Summer has started full swing, complete with hot days, warm nights, the color green everywhere, and picnics to be had all summer!

________________________________________________________________

Heather, Eric and I had a picnic today, and then walked around and went to the playground and a bunch of other things! It was the first time I got to see her in months, and of course we took plenty of photos!

These are just a few of the photos, but it was a great day! :)

<3 Kiersten

Chrissy Lech

2011-03-21T15:21:00.000-05:00

Is one of the people I look up to most in my life. Shes my cousin and I promised Id help pimp her out for charity...
http://www.crowdrise.com/chrissy

"And if people don't give you money then they're selfish and racist. And you can tell them I said that."

Please, anything at all is helping...

-heather

Day 26

2011-03-21T10:24:00.000-05:00

- What kind of person attracts you.
Clean. Funny. Clever. Cute. Smiley. Green Eyes. Playful. Stable. Loving. Affectionate. Intelligent. Happy. Artsy. Creative. Quirky. WEIRD as HELL.

It feels good to listen to love songs again. :-)

Day 25

2011-03-15T21:22:00.000-05:00

- Someone who fascinates you and why.
Michael Jackson. All he wanted was to show the world love, and the world shot him down at every opportunity. I dont think a man with his talent or desire to reach out to people will ever exist again.

As for me, I fall harder everyday.
-heather

Somedays

2011-03-13T16:13:00.000-05:00

I wish I could be completely naive of all youve done to me.

Circa Survive. On repeat.

Day 24

2011-03-12T23:14:00.001-06:00

- Your favorite movie and what it’s about.
oh jeeze. Im gonna take the easy way out and just say Fight Club, because I cant really think of any other movies I really love at the moment. As for what its about...Well the first rule is I cant talk about it...and the second rule is...yeaaaa....If you havent seen the movie and you dont understand what Im talking about then you need to see the movie.

Im retarded.

-heather.

I Hope You Know

2011-03-11T02:35:00.000-06:00

Exactly what you do to me.
You drive me absolutely fucking crazy.

Day 23

2011-03-11T02:22:00.000-06:00

- Give pictures of 5 guys who are famous who you find attractive.

These are my top four. I dont have a fifth.

-heather.

2011-03-08T15:37:00.000-06:00

Day 18: Your Beliefs
I suppose that I have beliefs, but I question them daily.
I was raised Catholic. I went to Catholic school from kindergarten through 8th grade, and only got out in high-school. (At which point, I lost a friend because her mom didn't want her hanging out with a girl who went to public school. But she'll never understand the reasoning that went into switching.)
I haven't been to church since probably 8th grade, or freshman year of high school, a fact which I"m okay with (for the most part. There are days where I tell myself I should try to go to church)
I'm certainly not Catholic by choice - and I'm old enough now to make that choice for myself. I don't agree with the belief system that goes into it, and I find it a hypocritical organization.
However, I think I would like to have some sort of faith in my life, one day, when I figure out what it is that I believe. There are days where I believe without a doubt that there is a God (or at the very least, moments), and others (more of which) I'm not so sure because of the things that happen in society. Besides, I'm practical - I like proof, as unscientific as I am.
I do believe, however, that you should never treat a person badly for any reason, and that judgment is cruel (another thing which I don't like about the Catholic church - judgement is a practice they invented). I always find it so disgusting when I hear a person judging somebody else, especially someone they don't actually know. (I do it myself because I'm human, and I'm trying really hard to stop that)
Okay, done now.
<3 Kiersten

Day 17

2011-03-07T17:47:00.000-06:00

Your highs and lows of this past year:

There have been a lot of both highs and lows over the past year. That's how life works. I try not to live in the past though, and that means not recounting every event. Besides, like I said, there are a lot of them, and I don't feel like recounting them all.

There were some moments in my senior year that were pretty bad, but I think I ended high-school on a really good note, and so far I love college. :)

Mmm, coffee quotes

2011-03-05T15:57:00.000-06:00

I thought this was worth posting. You know, because it's Augusten.

<3 Kiersten

Day 22

2011-03-05T14:45:00.000-06:00

- How have you changed in the past 2 years?
Im not as angsty as I used to be. Im more laid back I believe. I think thats really the only major change in me. I still like pretty much all the same stuff, Ive just kind of grown up a little is all. Im also learning to come out of my shell a bit more.

pre-shower. my mom says my hair isnt that red. I disagree.

post-shower. I was going to put on real clothes and do make-up stuff, but then I said who cares.

-heather

Day 16

2011-03-05T13:01:00.000-06:00

-Your views on mainstream music.
The term mainstream confuses me....is that rap? If so, I don't like rap. It's completely unoriginal crap about "I wanna get high and fuck that bitch" I don't personally think that the world needs one more "song" like that.
Yes, there are SOME rap songs that are not about that, but the vast majority are.

I do, however, listen to other popular music - Train, Katy Perry, etc. etc.

Okay, shutting up now.
<3 Kiersten

TUMBLR

2011-03-04T08:20:00.000-06:00

Day 15 - Your favorite Tumblrs

I don't really read any Tumblrs, to be honest. I tend to stick to Blogger, so my favorites of those are probably:
http://aurajoon.blogspot.com/
http://nicoleinthemaking.blogspot.com/
and
http://aliviathinksthis.blogspot.com/

<3 Kiersten

Memories (Day 14)

2011-03-02T20:12:00.000-06:00

Day 14 -Your earliest memory.

Hmmm...I think it was one of the following 3 (I can't remember how old I was in any of these memories) :
- my birthday the year I got my first camera (a Polaroid). The family was sitting in the dining room talking, and I was hiding around a corner taking pictures of them thinking This is what it means to be a photographer! Real photos are candid. I don't know what happened to those photos, or really any of the ones I took on that camera, though I'm sure my mom has them all somewhere. I always loved photography, apparently, and this is how I know that.

OR

- the time my brother locked my cat, Max, in my yellow toy washer and dryer. Max hated Corey after that.

OR

- one of the years we rented a house down in Wildwood for the summer. My grandmom had gone with us that year, and I don't know where the rest of my family was, but her and I were sitting in the living room. I was on the floor next to the coffee table writing a poem about summer because I'd just read one of the kid's newspapers Wildwood had (does anyone remember those? It was put out weekly just for kids all summer long) and noticed that they would publish kids' poetry/art in one section of it. I wanted my poem in there (I don't think I ever actually submitted the poem, but it's the first one I ever wrote I think, at least that I can remember)
Again, apparently I loved writing my entire life, and this is how I know that.

Like I said, I'm fuzzy on the ages, so I have no idea which one is my first memory. Sorry about that, but this way you got 3 times the fun!!!
<3 Kiersten

Day 13

2011-03-01T18:12:00.001-06:00

-Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.

Move? Well, I have a few places that I'd like to live at some point in my life:
-the city (NYC and/or Center City, Philly, and Boston)
-somewhere in New England (other than Boston, I mean)
-a small town like the one in Gilmore Girls. The town I grew up in was a more real-life version of that when I lived there, but it's not so much anymore...
-somewhere warm
-near a beach
-somewhere beautiful

As for where I'd like to visit?:
Everywhere.
More specifically?
-Ireland
-London
-Australia
-Greece
-Italy, specifically Venice (I love the idea of being surrounded by water, of travelling via gondola)
-Baltimore, Maryland. I'd like to visit Poe's grave-site (yepp, that obsessed)
-I'd like to see all 50 states, at least once
I'd like to visit everywhere, honestly. However, these are the ones that come to mind specifically :)
<3 Kiersten

I Hate Everything About You

2011-02-28T22:40:00.001-06:00

Why do I love you?

Day 21- One of your favorite shows.
Supernatural. I love that show. Its full of sexy men.

I looked really cute today. But he missed it. I hope he cries himself to sleep.

I need to start carrying around a note book. Every good idea slips from my mind seconds after it slips in. sigh. Things could be worse I guess... Maybe one day theyll be better. Maybe Ill get it right someday.

-heather.

Day 12

2011-02-28T08:13:00.001-06:00

Day 12: Bullet your whole day.

That's a really strange request...
~650ish - I wake up, and change the time on my alarm to 730, because I don't actually want to get up at 7 when my alarm was originally set to go off
~730 - my alarm goes off
~745 - I actually get out of bed
~800 - Film Theory
(now see this is where things change depending on the day, but todays a Monday, sooo)
~900 - free until 10 - right now I'm sitting in my room eating Irish Potatoes and writing this, but usually I just go to the Starbucks at the library until my next class
~1000 - Writing 205
~1100 - Algebra (ick)
~1200 - try to find someone who hasn't already eaten lunch (the lunch crowd starts at 12, so my friends all eat at 11)
~rest of the day - no plans yet. I'll do homework at some point...
~1130, 12ish - sleep
I live an exciting day to day life, do I not?
<3 Kiersten

Day 20

2011-02-27T15:55:00.000-06:00

-How important you think education is.
Very.

Sorry I havent been posting. Ive been busy with school and then I recently got sick with a stomach thing and long story short, I just havent had the time. Next week is spring break. I am excite.

This is me spending the day in my room, heavily medicated. My hair looks different colors in every picture I take, probably because of the lighting and how fast red washed out.
-heather.

Music Makes the World Go 'Round

2011-02-23T11:21:00.000-06:00

-Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.
This seems a little...pointless. But whatever, I guess.
   1) Stand by Me - Jason Mraz ~ I love this song, but for some reason I have a version that has no instrumental background...
  2) Through Smoke - NeedtheBreathe ~ When I first told Heather to look this band up, she thought it sounded really emo. I guess it does, but oh well, because they're not, and I love their music.
  3) Fuzzy Blue Lights - Owl City ~ I'm honestly not sure when the last time I heard this song was....
  4) The Call - Regina Spektor ~ Heather and I adore Regina. My favorite is either Braille or Samson, I think...
  5) Where the Story Ends - The Fray ~ another good religious band. (NeedtoBreathe is religious by the way)
  6) Never Grow Up - Taylor Swift ~ guilty as charged...I do have Taylor on my iPod....well, a few of her songs. This one happens to not be about a boy who "broke her heart", which makes it one of her better songs.
  7) People as Places as People - Modest Mouse ~ this song makes me think of junior year of high-school. Actually, Modest Mouse in general makes me think of junior year of high-school.
  8) Mad World - Michael Andrews ~ This song will always remind me of the Great Gatsby for the rest of my life, because my English teacher played a video about that book, and this was the background music.
  9) The Fourth Drink Instinct - Cute is What We Aim For ~ this band reminds me of a trip to Philly with Mary a couple years ago. Also, I love that they wrote this song.
  10) Such Great Heights - Iron and Wine ~ I used to only know the Postal Service version of this, but last summer when Heather, Danny, Amber and I day-tripped to Wildwood, this song came on while we were in HORRIBLE traffic on the bridge coming back into Philly, and at the moment, I thought it was a perfect song to be playing.

And that's 10 songs from my iTunes....
Yeah...
<3 Kiersten

2011-02-22T20:52:00.000-06:00

Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss.

Well, my first kiss was in my Freshman year of high-school, and it came from my first boyfriend.
Love...well, I'm not even sure how to define that. I feel like, if I were ever truly in love, somehow it would have stuck around. Of course I've loved people, but I believe that there's a difference between loving someone, and being in love with someone.

Sorry that I've been bad about this 30 day thing. (I guess it'll be a bit more than 30 days, huh?)
Life gets busy, and I'm certainly not going to complain about that, because I love it. <3

Last night it snowed, spelling the end to our couple days of spring-weather. But only a few more weeks till Spring, so I think I'll tough it out. Over Spring break I plan to take 2 of the 3 coats I have here home, and leave them there. (That's an exciting feeling!!!)
<3 Kiersten

Day 19

2011-02-20T14:03:00.001-06:00

-Disrespecting your parents.
I try not to disrespect anyone. Of course some times I do it to my mom unintentionally, since its easier to be hurtful to the ones we are closest to. As for my dad, I dont talk to him or see him that ofter, and when talking about him to most other people I call him by his first name.

-heather.

Day 18

2011-02-17T20:33:00.000-06:00

- Your beliefs.
Never hurt anyone on purpose for any reason.

Hair is darker too, but you cant tell...
-heather.

Day 17

2011-02-16T14:51:00.000-06:00

-Your highs and lows of this past year.
Almost all of my senior year of high school was a pretty big low. Starting college was a huge high. As for specific moments, I cant really think of any.

Ive been fairly happy these past few days.
The weather is getting nicer.
Im going to redye my hair tonight.
:-)

heres an extremely dopey picture of me being content in the moment:

herpderp.
heather.

2011-02-14T23:14:00.000-06:00

Day 09 - How you hope your future will be like.

Happy. I don't know for sure what I want to major in (I'm thinking business, with a minor in English or Communications, but I'm not sure). I'm never sure whether or not I want to be married - my opinion on that changes from day to day, though I think that one day I'll probably end up married...
All I know for sure is that I want to be happy, and I want to have and be making good memories.

I'm listening to the soundtrack from Wicked. I loved that play!!!
<3
Happy Valentine's Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Day 16

2011-02-13T23:25:00.002-06:00

-Your views on mainstream music.
I listen to both mainstream and underground music, theres almost nothing I wont listen to. Although I will admit Im not real into screamo, death metal, or hardcore gangster rap. But Ill still give anything a listen atleast once.

Me and Jimmy. We do things. Dont ask.

2011-02-13T10:04:00.000-06:00

Day 8: A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life

I don't know any specific moment or instance where I was like "yep, I'm satisfied!". However, I know I'm happy right now, and I know that I've been for a while and I'd like to stay this way.
Most satisfied, though... Well, we're human beings - it serves as part of the definition that we are never completely satisfied. It's a fundamental RULE of Economics that people have unlimited wants. I personally think that the only time in a person's life when they are completely satisfied is as a little kid.
That's not to say though that I'm not completely happy with my life right now!

Okay, done ranting now. And Happy almost-Valentines Day to all you people out there who have a reason to celebrate it :)
<3 Kiersten

And Here I Rest

2011-02-11T13:28:00.001-06:00

Where disappointment and regret collide.

Day 15 - Your favorite tumblrs
Yea, this is actually a 30 day challenge for tumblr. I do follow some tumblrs even though I dont actually have one myself. I just like to look at the pictures.
http://heycandace.tumblr.com
http://maxwellstandsalone.tumblr.com
Those are the 2 Ive been into the most lately, but I find new ones all the time to creep on.

In other news, I look like this today:

Very white. Its a sunny day outside. I cant wait till spring when I can open the windows and smell the fresh air. As for now Im just trying to get threw today. Last night was...bad, to say the least. But I think Im finally ready to move on and forget him completely. Gotta keep in the positive, I know its not like me to say that, but Im going to try.

-heather.

Tell me what's your sign

2011-02-10T19:45:00.000-06:00

Day 07 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.

Well, my zodiac is Saggitarrius.
I'll admit, I'm not a very superstitious person but I have looked up my sign a couple of times. Sag is supposed to be creative, gregarious (sociable), free-spirited, and love to travel and learn. I think I agree to a certain extent.
I think I can be creative, and would like to believe I'm fairly free-spirited. As for travel and learning, I love them both. However, I'd be the first to admit that I'm not the most outgoing person - I'm far too shy, which is something I've been trying to work on, but gregarious is certainly not a personality trait of mine.
So, I guess I'd say that I think Sag fits me, at least to a certain extent. And honestly, even with all this 2011-the-signs-changed stuff, I think I'll stick to Sag. I'm far too attached to it, plus at this point I consider it to be somewhat a part of who I am.
<3 Kiersten

Sorry

2011-02-09T16:08:00.000-06:00

I know I've been really bad about this 30 days thing. I'm going to start back up where I left off (Day 6) and try to actually be good and do it every day. So here goes.
30 "interesting" facts about yourself
(Just for the record, I don't find myself interesting....)

1) I ~~am obsessed with~~ love Edgar Allan Poe. If you know me even a little bit at all, you already know this. I own everything he's ever written, and I wrote my senior research paper on his short stories ( a paper I am immensely proud of, thank you very much)
2) I am currently reading Peter Pan, and even though I know I'm too old for childhood loves, I am head over heels in love with ~~Peter~~ this book - everything about it is ridiculously magical.
3) Also, in building off of my love of the aforementioned childhood literature, if I could have any "superpower", it would be to fly. All my life, I have wanted to fly, and I don't mean the kind of I want to fly that can be satisfied by sitting in the window seat of a plane. I think a large part of the reason I love Peter Pan is the fact that they all fly, and consider this a perfectly normal part of day to day life.
4) My favorite color is yellow, like the sun, like I imagine the color of happiness to be. Like post-it notes.
5) When I was little, my younger brother and I would drink Sunny-D, not because we liked the taste, but because we believed the claims that it gave you the power of the sun. I still don't much care for the taste, but if you offered me a Sunny-D right now, I might drink it just for the nostalgia
6) I have a horrible inability to watch movies without narrating them, at least in my head. When my brother and I are together, we both do it, so much so that my mom almost killed us when we watched The Shining over winter break. (When I'm with people, I try to keep the narration to a minimum, and carry on in my head. If prompted, however, I could do it out loud)
7) I have a severe Pepsi addiction. Though it's not this bad anymore, there was a time where I got headaches in the morning without it (the headaches may have been a lack of caffeine, but Pepsi's really the only caffeine I drink consistently)
8) I love anything with coconut. I know that most people despise coconut - I, however, love it. If I could figure out where to buy it, I'd probably drink coconut milk. My favorite coconut treat is, sadly, Irish potatoes (I say sadly because they're only sold once a year)
9) I wish I could cook. I know this is a horrible stereotype, but I feel like girls should be able to cook. I can't. Not even to save my life.
10) Johnny Depp, especially in Benny and Joon, is amazingness incarnate. (Even in The Tourist, which was a terrible movie for more reasons than just because of Angelina having a star role, he made me laugh. And I hate Angelina, and that movie was soooo beneath Johnny)
11) I swear Smart Water tastes better than regular water. Maybe it's the electrolytes
12) I own multiple (empty) photo albums. I have crazy ideas about filling them. There is a possibility that I love the photo albums themselves more than the idea of putting actual photos in them.
13) I could wander around a bookstore or a library for hours. And I do mean that.
14) Also, I could spend a hundred dollars at least in a bookstore, in less than an hour, if given enough money to freely spend like that
15) Mint-chocolate chip ice-cream is my favorite
16) I love the Beatles, especially George.
17) Calenders are somewhat of a guilty pleasure for me. I have a wall calender above my bed, a book calender (you know, one of those big ones), and a normal sized pocket calender. I have my Spring-semester schedule written on a weekly calender and taped to my desk, and I've been considering printing out a month calender each month and taping it to my desk, so that I can write stuff on it. (I don't write anything on my wall calender...it's more just for decoration and counting down days till things I look forward to)
18) I love plays, maybe because of my love of the city, I don't know. I've seen The Lion King, Beauty and the Beast, The Rockettes, Nutcracker, Hairspray, August: Osage County, Wicked, Chicago, Jersey Boys, and I feel like I'm forgetting something. Right now, I'd say my favorite was Wicked, and I want to see American Idiot. Granted, I did not like all of those (I was very young for The Rockettes, but I didn't like it. And Lion King was just obnoxiously LOUD)
19) I want to travel, and I want to live in multiple different places. For instance, I want to travel to Ireland, Italy, London, Scotland, and Australia. I'd like, at some point in my life, to live in NYC, in Boston, and a small town like ~~Autumn Town~~ the one on Gilmore Girls (the kind that has festivals and parades and the like)
20) I considered once, for a couple months, getting a tattoo on my right wrist that said "Quoth the Raven, 'Nevermore'..." (Yeah, that obsessed)
21) I wish I could dance ballet (even though I fear that it could turn me into Natalie Portman...)
22) Some days I fully believe, without a doubt, that I want to be married one day. Other days, I think that marriage is only a set-up to destroy a relationship. It switches back and forth constantly. Right this moment, I think that I will be married one day, no matter what the outcome of that may be
23) If I do get married, my dream wedding would be in the Philadelphia Art Museum. (just think about it, photos on those steps? in front of the LOVE statue? with the game piece statues? Amazing.)
24) I think my favorite love song might be Oh Darling, by the Beatles. I used to hate that song, but over the past couple of years, I've grown to love it. But I also love Have a Little Faith in Me by John Hiatt, and Samson by Regina Spektor.
25) Photography is how I compensate for my lack of drawing/painting abilities.
26) I was born exactly a month early - I was due on Christmas day
27) I'm trying to stop cursing, at least when I write. I don't want to look back on notes and letters and blog posts and such one day, and see that I cursed like a sailor
28) I sort of like my state license photo. My school ID, however, is another story entirely
29) I still sleep with my childhood teddy bear. Theodore Roosevelt (yes, I'm serious. I call him Teddy though) is as old as I am (he was a happy being born day present from my aunt - I got him while I was still in the hospital). I've had to re-stuff him, resew him, have a new eye sewn on, have his nose glued on, and I am still planning on keeping him until the day I die.
30) I like the word espionage. It sounds cool.

There. 30. I don't even know how I did that.
<3 Kiersten

You Cant Fake It Hard Enough

2011-02-07T13:19:00.000-06:00

To please everyone. Or anyone at all.

Day 14 -Your earliest memory.
I dont really remember anything from when I was really young. My first day of kindergarten maybe? I cant really think of anything because I dont really care. My childhood was a strange place.

I want to date a guy who smells sweet and dresses nice and treats me right.

"As for now Im gonna hear the saddest songs and sit alone and wonder how youre making out. And as for me I wish that I was anywhere, with anyone, making out."

This post was supposed to go up yesterday but I got distracted while looking for a picture that would go with the post, so Ill be doing 2 of these today.

-Heather.

Day 13

2011-02-05T17:24:00.000-06:00

-Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.
THE BEACH.

no frenches today because I cant figure out how to do it with out it looking stupid.

not that I look any less stupid in this picture.

Day 12

2011-02-03T22:59:00.000-06:00

- Bullet your whole day.

8:30. Wake up. Brush teeth, get dressed, check internet.

9:30. Geography class.
10:50. Come back to dorm, Shower.
12:00. Art criticism class.
1:20. back to dorm. Lunch with Britt.
3:00. Health class.
4:20. Walk to my sisters car and scrape the ice off
5:00. Back in my dorm with Britt.
6:00. Dinner
7:00. Hid candy in my sisters dorm and played on the ice outside.
8:00. Johnson Hall. With Jimmy
11:00. See him. Leave as fast as humanly possible. Like a bitch.
11:15. Back in my dorm, on the internet.
Eventually. Bed.

So that was my day. Not very detailed, but not too much happened. I wasnt as depressed today as I have been lately, so I guess thats good...

-heather.

Eat Your Feelings

2011-02-02T17:54:00.000-06:00

Day 11

2011-02-02T12:33:00.000-06:00

-Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.
This is stupid. Im gonna do the first 10 songs and how they make me feel.
1. Hit That. The Offspring. I havent listened to this in forever, it reminds me of when MTV actually had videos on during the day.
2. Wish. Lifehouse. I dont ever really listen to this, I just have alot of Lifehouse on here for some reason.
3. Mannequin. Katy Perry. Off of the album One Of The Boys, because I liked her before she sold out.
4. 1,2,3,4. Plain White Ts. Stupid Love song. Ugh. Cant listen to it.
5. Sway. Michael Buble. I love his voice. Its old timey.
6. Lapdance. Nerd. Not in the mood.
7. Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Greenday. I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known..
8. Papers. Usher. I cant figure out what this song is about, divorce maybe? I love Usher though.
9. The Riddle. Five For Fighting. Cute song.
10. Grenade. Bruno Mars. Easy come, Easy go.

Well that was pointless.
-heather.

Gladiator

2011-02-01T18:42:00.000-06:00

I never realize how long it's been since my last post, until I see how many times Heather has posted in the interim. It's been a while...

Sorry

We've had SO much snow here in WC, and I think at most, I've had each class 3 times apiece. That's bad...considering we're 3 weeks into the semester...So because of this, my prof's are all assigning crap-tons of homework and readings, and I currently have 3 papers and a short story to write... So I've been trying to keep up on my homework and such, and have actually been getting a lot done, but that means Hazelnut has fallen to the wayside.

Right now I'm watching Gladiator (for my Film theory class). It's approximately 3 hours (minus about 10 minutes) and I'm only an hour in. Currently, people have been purchased. And now they are being thrown into a ring so that people can watch them kill each other. This can not be based on any sort of truth. In a way, I'm sort of enjoying it, but at the same time I'm not a huge fan of the gore...
2 more hours. We'll see how I feel when it's over.

They're calling for a horrible storm tonight. Granted, Pennsylvania exaggerates winter storms to the point where if you're not used to it, you'll be convinced you'll die if you leave your house, but still. I think it's supposed to start around 8 or 9, and go until 3am. Guess I'll see what happens, but I'm guessing no morning classes tomorrow. At the very least, no 8ams.

I guess I should go pay more attention to slaves being thrown in a dome to kill each other...
<3 Kiersten

Im Not OK

2011-02-01T17:09:00.002-06:00

I Wont Be Angry.

2011-02-01T12:00:00.002-06:00

if you have to leave. But I won’t be waiting for that day. So don’t say you’re sorry, because I won’t believe you.
Circa Survive.

Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss.
My only love. It lasted about 2 years and I miss it all the time. I still love him, apart of me will never let go of what we had. He was the only one I ever felt at home with, like I wasnt missing anything when I was with him. We just had fun, all the time, and every other couple wanted to be just like us. People constantly told us we were amazing together, and we were. But then things went down hill and we started fighting alot and so I ended the official relationship, but the feelings lingered for a very long time after. Were still good friends even tho we dont talk all that often. But to be honest, I go back all the time in my mind. As for my first kiss, it was stupid and pointless and meant nothing to me or him. I think people put too much stress on "firsts" I mean honestly, how often do you get it right on the first try? Rarely...

I slpet in the french braids and now I look like this. Also trimmed the bangs finally. Maybe Ill start doing a daily webcam picture because its easy and Im vain as fuck...
-heather.

French

2011-01-31T15:00:00.003-06:00

Braids.
Roommie did them.

And Im actually wearing eye make up shit. Every now and then I like to appear physically attractive, ya know, to keep people on their toes. Bangs is hella long.
-heather.

Fuck The Pain Away

2011-01-31T10:54:00.002-06:00

"Suckin' on my titties like you wanted me, callin' me, all the time."

Day 09 - How you hope your future will be like.
Kind of already answered this, with the 10 years question... I just wanna be happy with no money problems. also in a stable relationship with someone I cant take my eyes off of, and vise versa.

In other news, Im trying not to care about anything. Lets see how long I can last.

-heather.

Day 08

2011-01-29T10:28:00.001-06:00

- A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.
About 2 weeks ago. But thats gone now so I guess I just need to forget it ever existed in the first place.

Im having friends coming to visit today. I cant wait till theyre here. Its going to make everything all better, at least for a couple hours. And then theyll be gone and Ill go back to being miserable and waiting for death...sigh....

This is gonna be a John Mayer type of week. I can tell.

-heather.

I Hate Myself

2011-01-28T09:48:00.001-06:00

I wish I was dead, but I dont know how to do it.
Take some pills or hang myself?
Too confusing, screw it.
So Ill live another day, and tomorrow I will say:
I hate myself I wish I was dead...

Sorry I only did 25 facts, but really, who cares anyway? No one, thats who. NO ONE GIVES A FUCK.
In other news, my boyfriend broke up with me, and now I once again have no friends at school. Yay.

Day 07 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
Leo. I dont give a fuck.

-heather.

Day 06

2011-01-28T06:51:00.002-06:00

-Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.
My life is boring. Ill try to make this as painless as possible.

1. I am afraid of just about every social situation I can think of. (answering the door, interacting with strangers, etc. )
2. I love Michael Jackson for more than just his music.
3. I believe there is never a justified reason to hurt someone else on purpose.
4. I like short hair cuts on girls.
5. I find it alot easier to get along with guys than girls.
6. I havnt had my hair professionally cut since I was 15
7. I have a deep love of art in all its forms, I just wish I was better at it.
8. I have no idea what I want to do with the rest of my life, and that scares me.
9. My nails are currently painted rainbow tie dye
10. Ive always struggled with being myself, and liking myself for who I am.
11. I love listening to the radio in the car.
12. I like spooning.
13. I am really bad at spelling.
14. Ill eat basically anything.
15. I dont trust anyone and have a hard time believing that what someone tells me is the truth.
16. I dont like being alone.
17. I would always rather be at the beach.
18. I love to watch people in places like malls and cities.
19. I love cows, I dont know why, I just always have.
20. I dont think you need a big fancy camera to take great pictures, but it sure helps.
21. I have a love hate relationship with college
22. I am really weird and alot of people dont know how to take it.
23. I am never bored. Ever.
24. If I dont shave my legs everyday I feel gross.
25. Im currently miserable.

-heather

Day 05

2011-01-23T22:04:00.000-06:00

-A time you thought about ending your own life.
Several times actually. The most recent and most serious would probably be one of my first weekends at college. I was alone a felt entirely isolated. Its something Ive thought about a lot in the past, but Ive been better lately, and its been something like 2 or 3 months since Ive had those thoughts. Its almost hard for me to believe that there are people out there who have never contemplated suicide, and its really upsetting when people say "its the easy way out of your problems" because thats not true at all. People who kill themselves dont do it because they want to, they do it because they feel its the only way out, they see no other option. I guess I just dont value my life that highly. I mean, dont get me wrong, for the most part Im happy right now, happier than Ive been in a very long time, and Im trying really hard to keep things this way, but I dont think theres ever really been a time when I thought about dying and was upset. Actually, now that I think about it, I would be upset if I died right now. Wow. I guess life really isnt so bad sometimes...

Because of how depressing this post was, heres some pictures of me with puppies...:-)
-heather.

Day 04

2011-01-22T11:31:00.001-06:00

-Your views on religion.
Believe what makes you happy, as long as its not hurting other people. Personally, I dont practice a specific religion, but I do believe in a "higher power" and that there is some sort of after life. Also, just as a side note, I believe having blind faith is the most powerful thing anyone can have. It amazes me how some people can just believe. I love it, most likely because Im the type of person who is never sure of anything. It gives me hope for humanity.

-heather.

Religion?

2011-01-22T10:58:00.000-06:00

Day 4 - Your views on religion

I'm not entirely sure how to answer this. I was raised Catholic, and went to Catholic school from Kindergarten through 8th grade. I started public school in high-school because of some stuff that happened.
I'm not a huge fan of the Catholic church. I think that their laws are incredibly judgmental and hypocritical, and designed to keep a lot of people out of the church. If God is all forgiving and loves everyone, then why should you have to right to tell certain people they're not allowed to pray with you?
And I don't want it to seem like I have a personal vendetta against the Catholic church, but it's the only type of church I've ever attended. I'm fairly uninformed on other religions.

Okay, I'm done now, because this is a highly inflammatory topic, and I'm not sure what else I can say about it.
<3 Kiersten

Day 03

2011-01-19T10:46:00.000-06:00

-Your views on drugs and alcohol
I dont care. Im against smoking pot because its illegal and if you get caught you can get in serious trouble, however, if you do it under circumstances where you know you wont get caught, and it doesnt impact me in any way, I dont care. Unless youre a very close friend or someone Im dating, I dont care if you smoke. As for alcohol, I have drank before, not a lot and not often and not lately. I dont really drink now because the friends I have now arent really into that, and thats fine with me. Lastly, I think smoking cigarettes is just plain stupid, almost stupider than smoking pot, at least when you smoke pot you have a reason (to get high). I really just dont understand the benefits of smoking ciggs. I feel basicly the same toward all other drug categories, except for some of the really hard stuff, that you shouldnt do just because its so dangerous, let alone all the other justifiable reasons.

In non-drug related news, I date this:

I pick winners.

-heather.

Day 02

2011-01-18T12:42:00.000-06:00

-Where you’d like to be in 10 years.
Specifically, I dont know. All I know is Id like to be happy, in love, and no longer have problems with anxiety. Id like to have a job that pays well, and not have to worry about having enough money to get by. That is all.

In other news, Im back at school. Im trying to remind myself that everything isnt as bad as I make it seem in my head, and none of this really matters, but its hard. Its like starting over in a new place all over again. I hope he realizes how much Im giving up for him.

-Heather.

Crack is Whack - A PSA From Kiersten

2011-01-17T22:01:00.001-06:00

Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Well, I don't drink or do drugs - I've actually never even had a sip of alcohol (a fact which I am proud of).
As for alcohol, I find it disgusting and pathetic when people drink all the time, no matter what your age. I know it's a cliche, but can't you have fun without getting drunk? Are you unable to handle your friends without first impairing your judgment and ability to remember any of it? I just think it's entirely unnecessary.

As for drugs, I think that they are the absolute stupidest thing anybody could ever do, and the easiest/quickest way to screw up your entire life and future, as well as the lives of those people around you.

Okay, that's all I have to say about that. :)
<3 Kiersten

Back to school

2011-01-16T19:21:00.000-06:00

Day 02 - Where you’d like to be in 10 years.
In 10 years? I have no idea. I don't even know what I want to major in, and that's a decision that I have to make within a year!
I do have idea of things that I'd like to happen - I'd like to live in New England (I think), where I can lie on a blanket in my backyard, watching the stars. (but then again, New England is cold...maybe somewhere warm...) I'd like to be working in a job I love, whatever that may be. I'd like a comfortably sized house with a wrap-around porch. (I don't think that'll happen within 10 years, but a girl can dream)

In other news, I'm back at WCU today. Right now, Katie Matt and I are watching the Golden Globes. I've never actually watched these before, but that's okay. We're having fun. :)

<3 Kiersten

Day 01

2011-01-16T07:10:00.000-06:00

-Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
Im not exactly sure how to answer this. Technically I suppose Im single? But not really because Im just waiting to go back to school (which is happening today) so we can make it "official" so I guess what Im saying is yes, I have a significant other who currently, I would not label as my "boyfriend" Also, he gives me butterflies.
:-)

-heather

Also...

2011-01-15T23:01:00.001-06:00

You guys know the 30 Day Project Heather posted about earlier? Well, I think I'm going to give it a try as well, so here's Day 1.
Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
I'm single, which I'm sure you guys know, and I'm happy with that. I think it's basically the same whether you're in a relationship or not, as long as you're comfortable with yourself. I never want to be the girl that finds a guy I love, and declares that "I've found my other half", because then who was I for the last however many years of my life? I am who I am, and I don't think another person should have any bearing on that.
I'm having fun being single - not that I'm running around partying every weekend, but I don't mind it. I'm 19, so I'd like to date, of course, but I'm not going to rush into it, or wish for it to happen, or anything like that.

<3 Kiersten

some typical ranting from Kiersten

2011-01-15T22:47:00.000-06:00

Tonight is my last night in Pottstown for a while - I head back to WCU tomorrow. I'm excited to get back, because I love being at school. But at the same time, I'm already freaking out about a bunch of different things, and the semester hasn't started.
Mainly, I'm freaking out about 1 thing in particular, but still. I am who I am, and since I was a little girl, I've always been a worrier. I worry about things that don't matter, about things that I know will be okay, about things that wouldn't affect me except for the fact that they affect someone around me, and therefore I worry about that person's opinion of the outcome of the matter (if you understood that, kudos). I worry constantly - every time one thing I'm worried about goes away, I immediately find something new with which to replace it. I'm not sure why I'm like this, and I know it's not at all healthy, nor will worrying do anything to change the outcome of something

"Don't worry. Or worry, but know that it's about as effective as using bubblegum to solve a math equation" - Baz Luhrman (remember a year ago when I told you that we love him?)

I'm worried. It's who I am.
But I'm also excited.
And finally, I am freaked out, because I just watched The Shining. That movie, due to the fact that it's based on a Stephen King novel, and Jack Nicholson plays the husband, is creepy as shit. Honestly, it's the first movie to freak me out this much in quite a while. I don't know what it is about the movie that freaked me out so much, except to say that my biggest fear has always been the idea of being completely alone in the world (a very Stephen King idea) - and The Shining is about the closest I've ever seen a movie or book or anything get to. It's just Jack, his wife, and their son alone (unless you count the numerous ghosts....) in an enormous hotel in Colorado, trapped in with no connection to the rest of the world because the snow is so bad.

I'll stop talking now...
<3 Kiersten

Im Going To Do This

2011-01-15T17:00:00.000-06:00

Its possible Ill miss days, but atleast when I do go to post a blog Ill have something to write.

Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
Day 02 - Where you’d like to be in 10 years.
Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 04 - Your views on religion.
Day 05 - A time you thought about ending your own life.
Day 06 - Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.
Day 07 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
Day 08 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.
Day 09 - How you hope your future will be like.
Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss.
Day 11 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.
Day 12 - Bullet your whole day.
Day 13 - Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.
Day 14 - Your earliest memory.
Day 15 - Your favorite tumblrs.
Day 16 - Your views on mainstream music.
Day 17 - Your highs and lows of this past year.
Day 18 - Your beliefs.
Day 19 - Disrespecting your parents.
Day 20 - How important you think education is.
Day 21 - One of your favorite shows.
Day 22 - How have you changed in the past 2 years?
Day 23 - Give pictures of 5 guys who are famous who you find attractive.
Day 24 - Your favorite movie and what it’s about.
Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why.
Day 26 - What kind of person attracts you.
Day 27 - A problem that you have had.
Day 28 - Something that you miss.
Day 29 - Goals for the next 30 days.
Day 30 - Your highs and lows of this month

I think Ill start it either later tonight or tomorrow.
-heather.

Florence And The Machine.

2011-01-15T01:38:00.002-06:00

Oh. My. God.

Oh. My. Fucking. God.

This is the first band that Ive downloaded in months that I am completely satisfied with. Her voice is so powerful, not to mention shes just as amazing live. I recommend using headphones.

Some Day...

2011-01-14T16:57:00.003-06:00

Kiersten McMonagle 5:50 pm
    im watching gilmore girls
    and the mom and a few of her friends who own the inn together
    just laid down in one of their backyard
    and were watching the stars
    and it seems like something really nice
    that i would like to have one day
   also, what do u major in to own a business?
Eric Adams 5:52 pm
    i have nooo clue
   is there a business major?
Kiersten McMonagle 5:52 pm
    i think so
    but i feel like u have to be specific
    like
    economics
    or marketing
    or advertising
Eric Adams 5:53 pm
    hmmm
Kiersten McMonagle 5:53 pm
    il talk to my advisor person
    see if they know
Eric Adams 5:53 pm
    yea
Kiersten McMonagle 5:53 pm
    and then i can open a restaurant
    ooorrrr
    a bookstore
Kiersten McMonagle 5:53 pm
    oooorrrrr
Kiersten McMonagle 5:53 pm
    what other kind of business could i own
    ?
Eric Adams 5:53 pm
    hmm

    a zoo
Kiersten McMonagle 5:53 pm
    hehehehe
Eric Adams 5:53 pm
    heheheheh
Kiersten McMonagle 5:53 pm
    or an inn
    a cute little inn
Kiersten McMonagle 5:54 pm
    in new england
Eric Adams 5:54 pm
    and u can lay in ur backyard and look at the stars
Kiersten McMonagle 5:54 pm
    yess

<3 Kiersten

Love Is Love

2011-01-14T09:05:00.000-06:00

Hello January

2011-01-14T08:15:00.001-06:00

Im going to miss this so much when I go back to school.

Regina

2011-01-13T14:19:00.000-06:00

Regina Spektor is adorable. I absolutely love this song, and this video is amazing! (youtube wouldn't let me embed the official video)

Not Anymore.

2011-01-13T12:22:00.000-06:00

Memorial

2011-01-12T20:14:00.000-06:00

I know this needs to be brought up, but I have no idea how to talk about it.
I am currently watching President Obama give a memorial speech on the Tucson shooting. Thank God, Rep. Giffords is doing well and is recovering, but still - 6 people were killed, 1 of whom was a 9 year old girl who was born on September 11, 2001.
I don't know how to talk about this properly, or even what to say about it. But it's an absolutely horrifying thing and it needs to be mentioned on here, I think.
There was absolutely no reason for them to have died, especially when none of them were the intended victim, and I really think that there's no proper way to talk about it - but President Obama certainly came as close as is possible. I don't think there's any good way to talk about death - especially young, unnecessary, and unexpected death, so I don't want to say much here.

-Kiersten

Words

2011-01-11T08:00:00.000-06:00

You're and Your are two different words.
Then and Than are two different words.
I hate that right now there are tons of kids sitting in class rooms wondering why they have to be taught grammar lessons they claim to already know, and then you go and take a look at Facebook and see things like "If you change one thing in the past you're future wouldn't be the same." and "I love him more then anything"
These are the two grammar mistakes that frustrate me most, because to me they are so obvious, especially you're and your.

You're- means "you are" (ex. You're my best friend)
Your- indicates possession (ex. Did your dog run away?)
Then- most often references time (ex. We ate, then we went home.)
Than- most often used in comparisons (ex. She's prettier than I am.)

Now that Ive gotten that out. Hears a puppy.

-Heather.

Dont Question, Just Believe.

2011-01-09T23:11:00.002-06:00

The Future Freaks Me Out

2011-01-08T18:18:00.000-06:00

(Before you begin - if you are not a close friend of mine (and I say this for your protection) and have no investment in my life/future, do not read this!!! I promise you - it is a rant about shit you couldn't care less about. And there are no pictures)

__________________________________________________________________________________

I haven't the slightest idea what I want to do with my life right now. Okay, that's a lie: I have 2 ideas, but I can honestly NOT decide which I want to do. In one minute, I'm absolutely positive that I want to get my master's degree in English and teach college literature. In the next, I think "Kiersten, what the hell makes you think you can teach?!?!?!?! You don't have the patience for that! And you're a girl - the only teachers/professors that people love are men!" (Because yes, I want to be that professor that my students always remember and love) And then my other option is something in business - but what?! Advertising seems glamorous, but that was the one section in my marketing class that I wasn't great at - and even though I love marketing, and I'm good at it (at least that's what I tell myself, until I realize that there's a difference between a high-school class and DECA, and majoring in something and getting a career in it), when I mentioned it to my advisor, she informed me that there are a trillion pre-reqs before they'll even consider letting me into the business program, and most of them include math - and I don't mean algebra and prov/stat - I mean calc. and trig. And this is before I'm even in the major!

I don't honestly believe that I'm good enough at anything to major in it, let alone find a career in it. And with English, which I love - other than teaching, what could I do? (because let's just admit that I have very little in the way of patience) Be an editor, maybe. Work on a literary magazine - that's a nice dream. However, in practice, lit. magazines are probably hard to come by - and a job on their staff? Even more difficult. Screenwriter? (Now let me just say that this idea stemmed entirely from 2 things: a guy I know who also loves writing/English, and is majoring in screen writing. And 2) my mom went to a psychic when she was pregnant with me who told her that her daughter (me) would be working in Hollywood one day writing, and something about her son (my brother, who wasn't born yet). So I mean...she was right that they'd have a son, and she was correct in saying I like to write. ) The reality of my actually getting a job in that is probably slim to none. I googled a list of careers you could apply a English degree to - let me emphasize the word "apply", because most of the options listed require a lot of other degrees/schooling. Like lawyer, for example - that has not been an option since elementary school, when I realize everyone hates lawyers, and I'd probably have to work for a criminal, or against an innocent person at some point. Teacher/educator/professor - yes, they actually listed those as three different options, all of which I've already mentioned. A lot of options which would also require a business degree - marketing specialist, advertising, sales rep, etc. Philosophy? That's a joke of a career - what the hell do you even do with that, besides smoke pot and theorize, and if you're lucky, write a book or 2 by the time you're 100 years old. Psych? How the hell does English apply to that? Environmental planner - what the fuck? That's science, which I suck at.

Okay, I'm shutting up now....probably to go think happy thoughts and pretend that I'm one of those lucky people who knows what the hell I'm going to do with the rest of my life. Too bad I can't talk to my advisor - she's an idiot who suggests to undeclared students that "when picking a major, don't think about what kind of career you're going to get - it doesn't matter right now." Oh, well in that case, I'm going to duel major in Creative Writing and Literature of Edgar Allan Poe, with a minor in Photography.

Shutting up, for real this time.

<3 Kiersten (as if you hadn't figured that out by the ranting)

Snow

2011-01-07T08:14:00.001-06:00

Really pleased with these shots.

-heather.

Blah

2011-01-06T07:21:00.002-06:00

Started working on a new drawing today, never finished the last one. This one is for a tattoo a friend of mine wants to get, I told him Id give it a shot. Im feeling exceptionally blah at the moment. Not exactly sure what I want to do with myself.

Im also quite pleased with my new camera, the Nikon CoolPix. Yea, sure, its just another regular digital camera with no manual focus or zoom or anything too fancy, but the picture quality is still quite good. Im surprised with the macro setting, because it is able to capture most details, and the focus is pretty good too. Now I just need to work with the exposure settings so my picture dont turn out all white.

-heather.

Forever

2011-01-05T17:05:00.001-06:00

Ive never been more afraid of a single word.

Summer

2011-01-03T21:21:00.001-06:00

I miss summer. I miss dancing around in the Love Statue fountain in Center City Philadelphia while my 2 best friends sat there laughing hysterically. I miss walking around in the 95 degree weather on the 4th of July, in pursuit of the damn fireworks that were supposed to take place at Penn's Landing, and didn't.
I miss the warmth, and being able to just head outside, sans coat, boots, scarf, and gloves with my camera just looking for something new to take pictures of.
Summer.....

Now that my favorite part of winter (New Year's Eve) is officially over, I am desperately waiting for the groundhog to see his shadow.

<3 Kiersten

Ive Seen A Lot Of Fly Girls

2011-01-03T03:48:00.003-06:00

But Ive never been trippin' over a body like that.

Picture Time

2011-01-02T01:27:00.001-06:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!

<3
(PS These photos are a mix of taken by me, by Heather, by Eric, and by Jeff. And also, a mix of photos taken by Heather's camera and my camera. )

By Special Request...

2011-01-01T22:43:00.000-06:00

Heather loves this photo <3
-Kiersten

2011

2011-01-01T13:06:00.001-06:00

Happy New Year lovelies!

Though I was unable to see the fireworks, I spent last night with some of my best friends, and I'll have plenty of photos for you guys later!

For right now, enjoy the first day of 2011!!!

<3 Kiersten

Im In Love

2010-12-30T19:49:00.000-06:00

With the ordinary. And I could sit for hours finding new ways to be awed each minute.

Photography credit: Eric Adams.

Letters

2010-12-28T16:46:00.000-06:00

Read these words over and over and over again.

Try to imprint them into my brain.

Still waiting for the reality of the situation to hit.

Telling myself this is more than just a dream.

Snow Patrol

2010-12-27T04:43:00.002-06:00

When I listen to love songs I close my eyes and your face is all I see.

Movies

2010-12-26T20:18:00.000-06:00

"Over Christmas break, I'm going to...."
Okay, I had a list of fill-ins for that blank prepared in my mind, few of which have as of yet been accomplished. But the night is young (figuratively speaking), and I'm contemplating beginning what I feel is my 2nd most important task: movie marathon!
Now, this is relatively difficult since the only movie-store within reasonable distance for someone without a car closed last summer, leaving us movie-store-less. Therefore, my movie selections are cut down to what is available on-demand.
The reason that I say this is because tonight, I watched Benny and Joon. If you haven't seen that movie, immediately click into your on-demand, and find it. It's only $2.99, and I promise it's worth it, if for no other reason than that Johnny Depp is in it, and I think that fact speaks for itself. And if you don't have on-demand, go rent the movie. Now.

So, for this reason, I am going to list for you a few of my favorite movies.
   1) Benny and Joon
   2) Titanic
   3) What Dreams May Come
   4) Practical Magic  (also a great book, if you're interested)
   5) Sherlock Holmes (perhaps more because of my love of the time period, and Sherlock's appearance....and Watson's not too shabby himself...but still, definitely worth it! Great movie!

Now that I've sent you all off on your merry way to rent the aforementioned movies, at least 3 of which I know are on-demand (Sherlock, What Dreams May Come, and Benny & Joon), I shall go watch How I Met Your Mother.
Have a lovely evening!!
<3 Kiersten

xoxo

2010-12-25T03:51:00.000-06:00

So this is what happy feels like.

Merry Christmas.

2010-12-24T17:17:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas Eve everyone!!!
My family is going to be celebrating tonight, since my mom has to work tomorrow, and my dad brother and I are going to my uncle's house for Christmas day.
I hope you all enjoy your Christmas, and get everything you were hoping to get, and enjoy the time with family!

<3 Kiersten
PS. Heather's bad at secrets, I saw the hair.

Hello No One

2010-12-24T15:04:00.002-06:00

Merry Christmas Eve.

New hair. Dont tell Kiersten, I want to surprise her....

My Thoughts

2010-12-24T01:50:00.002-06:00

I Want This So Badly.

2010-12-23T02:51:00.000-06:00

And I know its wrong, and I know I shouldnt, but for the first time in a long time, I havent spent everyday wanting to kill myself, and part of that has to be because of you. Nothing else has changed. Only you. I have you now. And I wish I knew what it is I like about you, but I have no answer. We have nothing in common. And when they see me with you, they wont understand, I know theyll be mad, but every time I look into you eyes, I melt. I havent felt this strongly in a very long time. Im letting this happen. Ive never been so vulnerable. Im beginning to trust again. You could break me. You. Could. Break. Me. And I would only have myself to blame. I am letting this happen. I want this so badly, and I know that its wrong.

Its not often I talk about the metaphorical heart, but in all honestly, youre holding mine in your hands.

He Tastes Like You, Only Sweeter

2010-12-17T08:09:00.001-06:00

She looked like you from far away, but as I approached, there was clearly no comparison. I walk away again. She was just another pretty face. No one can hold a candle to you. You are the sun. I stared directly at you for so long and now I am blind. Blind to all others. I sit and suffer alone. Staring at the floor again, its the color of honey mustard, and I wonder, if I were to get on my hands and knees right now, and lick the floor, would it taste like honey mustard? Is this rock bottom? No. This just who I am. My irrational thoughts intertwined with my thoughts of you...

The blog title is Fall Out Boy. Its irrelevant to the post, but relevant to my state of mind. I go home at 1:00pm today. itll be good to get away for awhile and sort things out. itll be good to sleep carelessly.

a drawing, be critical, its bad I know, Ive been off the horse for a while but I plan on doing alot of work over my break:

-Heather.

Motion City Sound Track

2010-12-14T12:32:00.002-06:00

Lyrics are important to me in songs. Listen and just try to soak it all in.

Someone get me a paper bag?

2010-12-13T14:47:00.001-06:00

(for the hyperventilating)
So I just had my first mental breakdown of the season - the season being finals week.
I'm most likely going to fail my biology final, and probably do poorly on my psych final, neither of which I understood in the slightest bit, even though I've had a bio tutor all semester, and I've studied like hell for both of them.
My rooming plans for next year all pretty much fell through within the past few hours, and that only added to my stress.
So, I freaked out, as I am prone to doing. I've spent all day wanting to freak out, and as soon as I had the room to myself, that is precisely what I did.
Not that I feel any better having done so. I think I'm only more upset now.... Because now that I've freaked out about those two things, neither of which I feel any better about, I'm also realizing the other things I have to freak out about, like the fact that I have no job, and therefore no money, and still need to buy Christmas presents for quite a few people.
Or my speech tonight, because it is a speech, and therefore, I freak out.
Or, perhaps, the things I can't seem to make myself let go of, because I am terrible at letting go, even though I desperately need to do so, because it'd probably be a weight off my shoulders.
Today started with snow, a perfect setting for my mental breakdown.
Next semester, please come faster.
<3 Kiersten

Sleeping Pills

2010-12-13T08:15:00.001-06:00

I like being knocked out.
Take me to an unconscious home inside my head.
Its becoming more difficult to distinguish reality from dream,
Is it disturbing that I don't mind?
Sleep is a drug.
I long to hallucinate.

-heather

2010-12-10T12:18:00.000-06:00

I have been SO bad about posting on here. I'm really sorry.

Finals are next week, which I'm not too worried, except for Bio. Bio is absolutely terrifying.

My friends at school and I have been exchanging Christmas gifts. So far, I got the book The Perks of Being a Wallflower, a ginormous box of hot chocolate, a Cheshire cat mug, the world's coolest umbrella, a starbucks gift card, a mad-libs, and some awesome magnets! :D

My friends' writing teacher wants them to "add sparkle" to their essays. By using colored font, and clipart.... I think that's a tad strange for a COLLEGE level course....

I have class in about 45 minutes, and then I need to work on studying and such.

Yummm....hot chocolate.
<3

Emotional Attachment

2010-12-10T07:19:00.000-06:00

Sorry for not posting, its been a dry week. Ive also been sick recently. I am full of excuses.
I missing my last history class because I woke up late and I didnt want to go late cus Im not sure if its even a full class.
My head hurts.

-heather.

What Am I Doing?

2010-12-05T05:31:00.001-06:00

Its hard to relax
when were standing at an impasse.

Im sorry, baby,
but you have to know,
life just doesnt work that way.

Ive been up all night, dont ask why, Im not even sure myself. Im developing a sore throat and its gone from slightly uncomfortable to full on painful...ugh. As youve noticed most of my writing lately has been very short, this is because I dont really have time to be sitting on my laptop writing for extended periods of time. The things I post are just things that come to me at arbitrary moments in the day, and i think they sound good, so I run and write/type them somewhere, In order to post them. So theres a little update for you guys...
also, sorry I dont really post pictures anymore, my camera kinda sucks and most people who read this will see all the same pictures i would post here on Facebook so yea, not much of a point in double posting...

-heather

I Dont Care

2010-12-02T08:48:00.002-06:00

About being like, or unlike my peers anymore. There is no better place to be yourself than in college. I also dont care if you leave an arrogant comment on this blog. Do what makes you happy. I am.

(but just know, if you do leave an arrogant comment, you will get chewed out by Kiersten. Do you really want that?)

-Heather

This needs to be said

2010-12-01T21:25:00.000-06:00

Because obviously you didn't get it the first time around, back in pre-school. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything. (There, it's even bolded) Nobody is telling you or forcing you to read anything we write on here, so if you don't like it, or you don't like us, that's fine. Unbookmark the page, and navigate away. Chances are, we don't like you either.

To the rest of you, hi!!
I'm sitting in my room, drinking hot chocolate with multi-colored marshmellows!!!! (Be jealous) The people in my hall are being LOUD, even though quiet hours started 20 minutes ago. They'll continue to be this loud, and louder, until 1 or 2 am. Possibly later. So for now, I'm awake.

Finals are in less then 2 weeks!!!!!!! I. Am. So. SCARED!!

I want chocolate covered raisins.

<3 Kiersten

Dont Judge Me

2010-12-01T01:00:00.002-06:00

Can you be easy with out being a whore? I just love the attention, love being touched. I love human contact. It makes me feel less alone and lets me leave my own head. The warmth of a body, anybody next to mine is all I need to be content. Skin on skin contact. Electricity. Its a high and I never want to come down.

-heather.

Ireland

2010-11-28T21:50:00.000-06:00

I was just informed that my good friend Eric is going there over Spring Break.
I am INSANELY jealous. It is, like, my life goal to go to fucking Ireland, and he's going for FREE.
Have I mentioned that I'm transferring to Arcadia? (That's where he goes. They have the world's most incredible study abroad program.)

<3 Kiersten

Back to School Again

2010-11-28T21:21:00.000-06:00

Back to West Chester. Only for a few more weeks.
TIME FOR MY NERVOUS BREAKDOWN
Classes - for 2 more weeks
Finals - at the end of those 2 weeks.
I am overdue for a breakdown. I think because this Thanksgiving break ending, it's now hitting me that it's almost December.
And also, I'm 19. (I'm not going to go into how much that means to me)
I really like this color lately, though I don't know why.
<3 Kiersten

Someday

2010-11-28T05:48:00.001-06:00

Im going to find you and it will be all sparks and fireworks. Shooting stars and butterflies. It will be beautiful and free and spontaneous and we'll both be able to breathe easy knowing were exactly where we need to be. And Ill finally be comfortable with the word "forever". Someday.

-heather

~~~

2010-11-27T03:56:00.002-06:00

Oh the things we do
Just to say "I love you".
Oh but baby, dont you know?
You had me at hello.

-Heather.

Im Hot

2010-11-26T01:30:00.001-06:00

'Nuff Said...

Blueberries

2010-11-22T14:51:00.001-06:00

I've been bad. Blogging wise. I have been posting, at least not as much as I should be.

On Friday, I went out with Katie, Lauren, and Nicole. We went to dinner, and then out to a party. For my birthday. Wanna see pictures? Good, because I'm posting them.

(from left to right) Katie, me, Nicole, Lauren

Dinner was at an Italian place in West Chester called Limoncello. It was frikin amazing!

Then Katie, Nicole, Matt, Oliver and I went to a party, which was also very fun. :)

Sunday I had a store meeting for Pac Sun. We got to do role-plays, and watch a very strange music video set in a Pac Sun store. And then they gave us free t-shirts that say Seasons Greedy, which we have to wear to work on Black Friday. They also gave us free watches. They're rubbery.

"Tease the season!!!"

That's what Mr. Pac Sun wants us to say to customers when they walk into the store. But our manager told us "do not say that".

I just devoured almost an entire container of blueberries, singlehandedly. And not one of those small containers, either. Its a big one.

Tomorrow, I go home for Thanksgiving break. My birthday's on Thursday!! THANKSGIVING! (Heather is jealous of that fact)

Wednesday I work my first real shift at Pac Sun. YAYYYY! I'm really happy about this, because originally my first day was going to be Black Friday. And that scared me, because I'd have absolutely NO idea what I was doing.

I'm going to shut up now. Mainly because I think I'm going to order Dominoes soon...

You Were A Locomotive

2010-11-22T13:09:00.001-06:00

I was parked on the tracks.
Your momentum couldn't be slowed.
We crashed.
Now all we are is smoke and twisted steel.
A train wreck.

Thats right guys, Im going to start writing again. Now I realize, this is bad, but Im just getting back into it so give me a break.

-Heather

Tell Me,

2010-11-21T22:57:00.000-06:00

How Im supposed to breathe with no air.